Saturday, December 25, 2010

Pain, Family and Love

It is amazing how little people are able to handle the topic of I am in a lot of pain. I recently did a vlog on how I was in a lot of pain and I got messed with once again by disability. This was on Christmas Eve when I posted it by the way. I was almost mad with pain it hurt so much. I got almost no response at all. What I did get was a PM from the owner asking me to take the video down as I used the term, "Merry Fucking Christmas" in it. He I am sure was offended being that he is deeply religious and all. He almost became a Catholic Priest once you know. I took it down, but not because he was offended – but because I was over the top and did not want to be seen that way on this particular site.

It often comes down to the fact that a lot of people cannot seem to handle being told things they can’t relate to. They become very put off at times by this as well. It is not like they don’t have any sympathy for you, it is just they have no way to understand it and they fear it happening to them. So they just ignore it or they try to change the topic.

The video was also posted to YouTube and I left it up there. I don’t hold back anything on that site and tend to just say shit on there. I got a lot of response on that site as a lot of people that watch me there tend to have been in my situation many times. It is amazing to see how much of what I have had happen to me has happened too many I know. It seems that the people who have been threw the most pain, poverty and crap in life either turn into bitter minded criminal types or the best people you would ever want to meet.

I did have a strange one happen though. I got a PM from someone on YouTube that has a lot more wrong with him than I do. It seems it was a competition to him or that he wishes to trivialize what happened to me because it is worse for him. I am sorry for what has happened to this unfortunate fellow, but in reality my pain was real and the fear of maybe not being able to pay the rent on time is also real. This is no less important to me or painful to me because someone else has it worse than I do. It is amazing how many people will say something stupid like "it could have been much worse". Yes it could have been, but my pain is still real and you can not relate to it obviously.

So on the light side, I got some nice things and had a wonderful time with family and friends. I received a Tea set with some wonderful tea in it; Some Greek spices and a cook book; and $50 from my Mom; I have food in the apartment and plenty of it. My pain is still here but managed for now; It is warm, safe and dry in here; I am loved be many wonderful people. So it was a wonderful Christmas after all. Oh and I was deeply reminded of why it is Christmas.

To end I would like to say, "Thank you Jesus" and "hugs and love to you all".

Monday, December 13, 2010

Something Short.

I can very much relate to the longing for being something you are not and to want nothing more than a silent lonely death. But I overcame and am now what I thought I had lost. I found hope inside - deep inside. Now I wish nothing less than to give this gift to others.

Peace and Love - Dave.

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Moms in the Hospital.

Mom's in hospital (Dec 04, 2010)


Mom Still In The Hospital (Dec 05, 2010)


Mom Update Dec 07, 2010