Sunday, October 30, 2011

Monday, October 10, 2011

A Walk Is Not Always Good For Ya

Well took a 5 block walk and it almost did me in. Now the pain is way worse. I don’t know what I was thinking. But I did get some cool photos; still I should not have pushed it. The pain in my ankles is throbbing and this is the day after. My knees are killing me and I need to finish a project. Will take a while as I have to get up and move all the time. The nerve blockers are not really working no more. I wonder what happen if I just stop taking them? I should ask the pharmacist if that is a good move. I can’t have a beer now and then on these as well. Something about my heart stopping or going funny. The hell if I want that to happen.

P.S. Haven't had even 1 beer in 6 months.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

This is what happened to Mom when someone did not think first. The person took off some tape on her arm and ripped a rather large piece out of her skin. There is an open wound there now. It also ripped down from where you see here to the far side. Like she does not have enough to worry about with stage 4 lung cancer.

She recently had a blood transfusion as well. This is due to the chemo killing off the hemoglobin in her body. She will need more in the future as well I am sure. All they can do now is try to get her to live longer. There is no hope of surviving this. We where told that the times they where treating her for lung infections it was actually cancer. There is no way to tell if she would have made it threw this if they knew sooner and I am not going to play that game. I need to concentrate on making her remaining time as good as it can be and not fighting a loosing battle with a fatally flawed system.

She smoked for 40 years or more and there is no wonder why this is happening. If you think the risk is worth it, your stupid in my mind. That being said, I took the risk. As well it's your choice to make, not mine. All I can say is this is not a death that I would want for anyone.

I could go on about our health care system, but there is no point. I am looking thew eyes that are tainted with what I want for my mother. I can't be objective in this matter, it's not possible. I also know very few of the facts in this matter. All I see is mom and I want her to live, but there is no way that is going to happen. It may not be soon, but it will happen. Anyone in my position that cares would be the same way.

Say a prayer for my mother and say one for me. I am thinking that I will be strong and I will stand tall. But the fact of the matter is I will fall and I will be in great pain. But this is not about me, this is about my best friend in this world, my mother. As the tears in my eyes fog out the words I type, the end of this blog is near. I will say a prayer for all the people who go threw this and their families tonight.

Peace - Dave.