Sunday, January 8, 2017

So You Think I Make More Than You?

So got me a friend I have known for most of my life. In fact since I was 6 years old. He has always been one of these people who thinks he is right no matter how much you can prove him wrong. So when he says something that is way out of line with reality, I tend to just pass it off and smile to myself knowing the reality of the situation.

We got talking the other day about him getting a car and he really does need a new one to say the least. The old one it about dead. But here is the thing the conversation flowed a while and then he said it... "You make more than I do". I looked him in the good eye and said "I make $1123 a month, I don't make more than you". But I forgot the golden rule of this fellow - he always thinks he is right.

Here are the facts. I know how much he makes and how long he works at the 3 places he works. Now there are several once ever 2 weeks places he cleans under the table like. So no tax on that AND I did not even use that money to calculate how much more he makes.

The reality is he makes about 3X what I do (not including under the table stuff a little less). Now you do the calculations based on last years tax formula and he is still making 2 1/2 times what I make.

Further to this, he is at home and does NOT pay rent. Yup 50 and at home - and NO I don't fault him for this, as he could never have any fun at all in life if he did NOT live at home. So... No rent. Yes he pays to drive his car and what not.

BUT - If I was making more money than he was, how come I can't afford to go fly out to some place for a vacation like he can? This alone should set reality into his mind. But it does NOT.

I am left to wonder what kind of lavish life style he thinks I have. Then that makes me wonder if he is in need of medication or something. But oh well. He is a good guy and has been there for me many times. Even if the emotional support is 90% one way (me sitting there listening to his problems). But then again that goes all the way back to grade 5 when I started to listen to everyone's problems and no one to mine. Oh well, can't have nothin'. LOL

But I am left wondering if it's a cognitive disunion or just a stubborn streak? He knows how much he has and I have told him what I make. So how in the world are you left with "you make more than I do"?

In the end I am all too used to this kind of thinking. For some reason there is actually a lot of people out there who think disability pays crap piles of money. Lets break it down for me...

$418 Rent and power
$30 for my phone
$675 for living expenses (this includes my internet and the REST of what my phone casts).

After the rent and bills it's about $530...
$300 goes for food every month on average.
We now have $230 left for EVERYTHING.

Every 3 months I need supplements. There is medication that is NOT covered ($18). There is clothing now and then. There is transportation. Random things like toothpaste and deodorant. So now I am less than $100 left. I tell you it's easy for that to be eaten up and most of the time that's exactly what happens - I end up ordering in or eating out and there goes the $100.

The most I can hope for is the GST rebate. This is 4 times a year. I just got mine the other day (this is the 8th it came on the 5th) and it's GONE. I used to for clothing and some supplies I needed to order and a bit of extra fun. April is the next one (5th) and it will be $166 just like this one was. $125 of this goes to the same person who thinks I make more than him for an conditioner. This is in fact a good deal of course as it's only been used for 2 months EVER. At that time I will also get another pair of sweat pants. One is getting a bit thing and there goes $50. So... This is more money than the GST rebate. And yes I know I get a pair at Wally World for $15 but they will only last me 3 or 4 months as they SUCK. These will last me years to come.

I am reminded - I need to thin out my T-shirt hoard. Some are getting to the point they need to be tossed. BUT I have a LOT of them - so no worries there.

Anyway this rambled on a lot longer than I expected and ended up far from the original point. LOL. All I have to say is sometimes people don't think correctly - this does not mean you need to be mad at them. He is a good friend and I love him like a brother. It's worth the frustration from time to time.


  1. People live in a little bubble of illusion like the movie the Matrix. For some that is enough, even though their best part then fails to develop and mature. Other people are forced to deal with reality because of pain and the necessity of caring for oneself because there is no one else. Of course, in doing that, it is also easy to forget other people altogether because it gets to be all-involving. In the end, one sometimes has to totally overlook what people say because their words flow off their tongue like a robot and they don't pay attention to what they say or the meaning of their words. You have a lot on your plate as they say, and I admire you for not crawling inside yourself and shutting the door. That takes courage, but as I am sure you know, it is better to face scarey things and wrestle your feelings than to try to fabricate a reality that often ends in mental illness or a very dark alley inside yourself. Keep on trucking :)