It Started With A Bag Of Sprinkles

November 4th 1995.

It all started with a bag of sprinkles and a jar of jam. It ended with a ride in an ambulance with a police escort and me trying to explain to the nice Doctor why I was covered in jam and sprinkles in the middle of a parking lot. I thought the part where I was singing I am the walrus was obvious, but I had to explain it twice. Thankfully the charges where dropped as long as I attended therapy sessions. Little did they know I was going to turn up in a latex walrus suit playing the trombone. Now it looks like I will be spending my birthday in the nut house. But this magic dragon plays a good game of chess and the coffee is not bad, although I think it's some form of decaf. I think that giant spider is trying to escape. Maybe when it tries next time, I can slip out the back door. I have fashioned a key out of soap and I am sure it will work in the door.

Your's truly the Great Tomato...

P.S. please don't mind if this is written on toilet paper...