July Blogging Challenge Day 1

What's on my mind right now?

My health mostly. I'm having issues with my legs to say the least this last three days. They hurt like hell, and I can hardly walk on the bloody things.

Thursday I go out for coffee (I hope) and don't know if I can get in my friends SUV or not right now. She keeps telling me to sit on the seat, then lift my legs in. Well I'm a bit too talk for that and my foot hits the door, and I have to force it in, and that really hurts. Getting out is the same thing, I have to force my left foot out.

Monday I have to go get money out for the doctors visit on Tuesday as the injection is not covered. I will pick it up on Thursday after coffee and put it in the fridge I guess. I got not one clue what to do with it, I've never done this before. I just hope it's covered by my plan (the drug - the injection done by the doctor is not).

What else is on my mind? Well I want a fecking drink of vodka or 20 right fecking now! But I can't be doing that to myself ever again. I almost dies 2 years ago from a fall caused by drinking and this time it was a hellish nightmare of a neurological issue that happened and it was seriously painful for about 18 hours.

Enough is enough. I rather want to never have this shit happen again. I did not even drink a tone of vodka. I did however wake up after 4 hours and finish the last 8 oz in the middle of the night. That could not have been good.

Whiskey never did anything to me like this, in fact it seems to be good for my tremors in my hands. But still, just stop fucking myself up might be a good idea.

I do get the idea of, I'm going to die anyway, why prolong it and have no fun while I'm living? But I have people who love me and I hope to God I stick to it this time. I don't think I'll ever stop really wanting to drink however.

Oh and Canada Day is on my mind as well. Woot Canada is #1 baby.

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