ARE THEY MONSTERS? A FEW THOUGHTS AND EXPERIENCES

7% of adults admitted to being LGBTQ, and 8% of adults people admitted to sexually interacting with an animal, while 22% of adults admired to being attracted to children sexually.

The number of males who admitted to being molested as a child is 1 in 6. The number of girls who admitted to being molested is about 1 in 4. These are people who where UNDER the age of 12 at the time.

I can't reconcile that 22%. That is really a lot of people and to think that in most modern counties this number is skewed do to the fact admitting to it gets you placed on a list for the rest of your life and can destroy your chances at a lot of jobs, makes me wonder just how many adults are attracted to children sexually. When I looked into this I figured maybe 5%. Wow was I wrong.

I know several people who where interfered with as children. It has effected their life and will continue to do so for the rest of their days - that is in a negative manner. What I find astonishing is there are people who claim they enjoyed the attention and felt pleasure. The fact that it has left them with deep emotional scars makes me thing that their sense of pleasure has made it worse. I have the suspicion that this is a justification to hide the real pain inside - some kind of coping mechanism. I honestly can't imagine a child would like this kind of attention.

Here is the question, are these people considered monsters for being attracted to children? Perhaps we need to call the ones who seek out child porn and actually touch children as monsters. There is the view of people who do view such porn of, "It's not victimizing anyone". Well there you are wrong, a child was harmed to make those photos and/or videos.

The normalization that comes with stories and cartoon images also I would think (I have no data on this, it's just in my thoughts) causes a deeper desire to harm a child. To be honest every case I've heard about where they molested a child, the person had all kinds of pornography in their home as well.

So why the hell did I go and look this up? Beside the fact that I know several people who where victimized, when I was 12 years old my youth pastor tried to molest me. He had me over in the house he was renting and started to take his clothing off in front of me. I ran home and told my father who was a police officer. The man was talked to and admitted to trying to molest me.

There was a level of guilt that I carried around after this even though I did nothing wrong and I was not touched in a sexual manner. To make it worse the offender committed suicide and when I found out I for a short time blamed myself for this.

This all makes me think how many people carry around a sense of guilt because they where harmed by a monster who crossed the line from attraction to action? I have to think that most of the harm is this sense of guilt. The people I have talked to in the past all had a sense of guilt, they all had it in the back of their mind that they caused this to happen. The reality is they did nothing wrong but this sense of shame will be with them for the rest of their life.

As for me years later I forgave the actions of my youth pastor and moved on. Still there is a bit of a stain on my life that will last for the rest of my days. Trusting people was never as easy after this indecent. To this day it's hard for me to start to trust people. I have to know them for a long time before the trust will form and I can call them a true friend.

To be honest the majority of people both male and female I had a relationship with (fell in love with) had a similar past, as in they where interfered with as a child. They all had some kind of mental issues and it did not last long. The longest I was with someone was 3 months.

Personally I've stopped desiring to have a life partner and have stopped having sex with other people altogether. It's been a solid decade since I desired a relationship or physical encounter. I am now happy to spend the rest of my days being just friends with people and taking care of the urge myself.

In any event, if you have issues relating to this kind of encounter as a child or even in adult life where you where forced, please seek help. There are professionals and groups that can help you cope with it. I won't post contact info for them as it will be different where you live. Keep strong and know you are worthy of love.


Comments

  1. How was the question asked to get a 22% result?
    Could have been the people answering were saying the children were "attractive" but did not mean in a way of wanting to have sex.
    Does looking at kids pics automatically mean the kids were exploited or harmed?
    I have seen guys arrested and the pics were family photos of kids in swim suits.
    So lots of unanswered questions along the way that make a HUGE difference.
    I have a strong tendency to adult female attraction so I can't directly relate.
    Suppose I had to deal with an odd attraction to animals or children. Not sure how
    I would handle it. I hope I would be strong and good enough to not act out on it.
    For those who do that, they should actually be praised by society.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The 22% was sexual attraction to children. I can't reconcile that big a numbe . One would think 8% or about. Also more would lie than admit to it even if it's a bling survey. So how that number is do large I don't know.

      For me I have urges to do things like castration. I never will, but the urge is there from time to time. People for the most part can get over impulses.

      Delete
  2. Honest I think the number could be even higher, there was a time where child brides were not uncommon, a part of who we were as humans, as soon as a girl could carry a child she was knocked up, then we started getting smarter, we studied anatomy etc and soon found out how damaging this was to the young girls and that is when it started to be frowned upon and eventually the vast majority of human beings stopped desiring to be with children.

    That doesnt mean it is not still in most people, it just means we moved on and accepted it is a no no, we even started calling it sick, but there was a time it was normal.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I really don't know. Some parts of the world it's still done.

      Delete

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