I Freaking Love The Internet

Sitting here listening to Purple Lamborghini while watching a video clip of a 500 lb woman in a latex school girl outfit as she suffocates some skinny red head guy chained to a bed (with her boobs). I start thinking to myself "God I love the freaking internet".

But then again my search history is something that would make the devil shudder and exclaim "boy you fucking twisted". But oh well.

It also brings me all my nice friends on Facebook and great vlogs to watch on YouTube. Not to mention the ability to pay my bills on my smart phone wile I take a dump and wonder where the hell that bruise on my leg came from.

Now I can order food delivered from the store and pay with my global payment card and have the guy put it in my kitchen for me. This entire time I don't actually have to talk to a real person, in fact if I do it right, the delivery guy will be the only actual real live human I see for the next 6 months... I have an appointment with the heart doctor in 6 months.

What could go wrong? After all if I don't post on Facebook for 24 hours someone will realize it's all gone wrong and call the cops for a welfare check. So I won't even be laying here dead for long. But the cops will be exposed to what ever twisted shit I had on the browser at the time. But I'm sure they see all manner of sick ass shit, so...

Yup we can work from home, play from home, socialize from home, order in and never go out. Did I not see an episode of some kind of TV show where it all goes wrong and this is how humanity ends? Oh well, time to search dwarf chocolate fetish porn. Have a good night all.


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